Site icon Pratyush Pandey

Why do we Lie?

This was an answer I wrote on Quora here

I think lying comes down to one word : Fear

Most of the lies I see are a direct result of fear:

  1. What if I tell this person the truth? Won’t he/she think I’m boring / weird / whatever?
  2. What if i tell my boss the truth? Won’t I be in trouble?

Greed is another cause – but I’ll say this is an indirect result of fear.

Lying – such as taking a bribe or selling a fake product or writing nonsense online pretending to spout wisdom

  1. It’s directly because of greed: A desire to make easy money / get attention / anything
  2. It’s indirectly fear: because you’re afraid to live without that money / attention, so you’re willing to lie for it.

These “bad” lies are also linked to self-esteem.

Someone who doesn’t mind becoming a liar so long as they get a little attention or money or manage to avoid being scolded by their boss or being thought of as different by their peers.

If you think highly of yourself, you’ll probably feel ashamed that something so insignificant is worth more than you not becoming a liar.

And even “good” lies are driven by fear in a way.

Lying to avoid telling an old person about their child’s death or the well- known example of lying to save a Jew from the Nazis

  1. It’s still a fear of the consequences – what will happen if I tell the truth? Someone will suffer.
  2. Is it “right”? That’s a completely different question. And obviously, there’s no one answer.

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